The Dork Ace Drabbles
by Storm.Reader21
Summary: The only thing more enjoyable than watching your favourite show is making fun of it and all it's characters. Written By: Storm.Reader21 and StormWriter 18.
1. GaryStu

**Gary-Stu**

The Aerrow and the Dark Ace were fighting valiantly.

Again.

The two of them were battling for a crystal.

Again_._

The battle was occurring on Terra Saharr, in the dry outback. The crystal, a glowing yellow stone was sitting on an outcropping of rock close by.

Hit , hit, slash, dodge, jump, twirl, wham, whack, bang, bang, and all that other good stuff.

Their weapons met, and their gazes locked.

"Give it up Dark Ace," said Aerrow.

"You can't take what I give." retorted the Dark Ace who suddenly, with a great surge of strength, swung his tuning fork, er, I mean double blade, and twisted Aerrow's blades out of his hands. Aerrow fell on his butt and his blades went skimming across the dirt.

The Dark Ace smiled and triumphantly waltzed over to the rock and took the crystal.

"Thanks for the rock, _Aerrow." _he grinned before jumping onto his Switchblade and taking off.

Aerrow sat there in the dirt till his team-mates arrived.

"Aerrow!" Piper was at his side, watching him with concern. "Are you all right?"

He kept staring straight ahead.

"I…" Aerrows spoke .

"Yes?" Piper said, holding on to his shoulder.

"I…" Aerrow repeated.

"Yes?" Piper edged on.

"I lost." Aerrow frankly stated.

"Oh" Piper said.

"I _lost._" He repeated, his eyes still staring out in the distance.

" It's okay Aerrow. We can get the crystal back." Piper said comfortingly.

"I _looooost." _The truth was finally sinking in.

"Aerrow?" Piper asked worriedly. He suddenly turned on her causing her to jump.

"How in the Atmos did I lose! I can't lose!" Aerrow complained.

" It's okay Aerrow. Nobody's perfect. It doesn't mat-" Piper started.

"But I'm a Gary-Stu!! I am perfect! I never lose!" Aerrow whined.

" Well if your so perfect than I guess you don't need my help." She snapped, turning around and walking away.

"Wait! That's not what I meant!" Aerrow called out. "Piper waaait! Come back. You're supposed to like me remember? I'm the Gary-Stu, I always get the girl! Piper waaaaiiitt!"

* * *

**_Reader 21:_ Finally. The Drabble Series you have all been waiting for! THE DORK ACE DRABBLES!! Yeah! Woah! Yeah baby! ****By yours truely (StormyReader21) and my sister StormyWriter18! Yes! I know. Such a beautiful partnership. **

**We have joined together to form ...StormyCreator39!** (_Just Kidding.)_

**_Writer18:_ Reader21 and I are going to alternate between writing although ususally both of us will contribute to the drabbles in some form. It's called the Dork Ace drabbles although, they won't necesarily revolve around around the DA at all. We just like the title Dork Ace.**

**And cleary we don't like Aerrow - or at least his gary-stu-ness. Because it's always about him, doing the most dangerous stunt etc etc. So take that Aerrow. FAILURE.**


	2. Easy Come, Easy Go

**Easy Come, Easy Go**

'I'm pure genius,' Finn thought as he walked hand in hand with a cute blond haired girl down the Condor's corridor. Finn smiled triumphantly.

Not long ago he and Stork had gotten into an argument about him never going on a date. During the argument, Finn got a brilliant idea and demanded that they head over to Vapos immediately. Terra Vapos, the one place in the Atmos where Finn could get a date with the snap of his fingers. When they had landed Finn had gotten the first girl he saw to come aboard the Condor with him, to go to Terra Neon for the day.

"Great Domo ,I have never seen a ship more magnificent in my entire lifetime," said the blond sweetly moving closer to Finn.

"Yeah. My ship is pretty great." Finn said proudly. The girl giggled.

Finn grinned and let go of her hand to put his arm around her shoulder. The girl smiled.

"Oh, Great Domo. You are so amazing. I don't know how I could ever repay you for your heroics." She said

"Well." Finn pretended to be mulling things over. " There is one thing." Finn said slyly.

"What?!" The girl asked enthusiastically. "I must know."

"You could give me a kiss." Finn said. Stopping in the corridor to face the girl.

"Just one?" She questioned worriedly. Finn was pleased with this question.

"As many as you feel fit for the Great Domo." said Finn moving closer. Her face broke into a grin. Finn put his arms around her as her arms found their way around his neck. Finn eagerly closed his eyes as he thought about how totally awesome he was. The girl closed her eyes as well and Finn could feel her body press against his as she leaned in for the kiss.

And then…_ nothing?_

Why had her lips not touched his yet? In fact, why didn't he feel her arms around him anymore?

He curiously opened his eyes, but the girl was no where to be seen. He looked down the corridors but no one was there. Then, out of the corner of his eyes, he saw a glimmer of light on the floor. He looked down at the ground to find a pile of sparkly blue dust.

Finn scratched his head confused.

**************

_Nothing can ever really leave Vapos._

* * *

**Reader21: Please Review! Tell us what you think!**

**Writer18: This is why Finn doesn't date girls from Vapos. They just lack...substance. **


	3. Her

**Her - A Deleted scene from _Dark Waters_**

**_By StormyWriter18_**

"Hurry, take mine," said Aerrow holding out his breather helmet at Piper.

"No Aerrow! She said sounding distraught.

"There's not time to argue," said Aerrow, which was true. The ship was quickly filling up with water. "There's still two miles of water between us and any air".

"So what," cried Finn, "You're just gonna go down with the ship?"

"I'm not giving up on the Condor yet. There's still a chance we can save her if the engine room doesn't flood."

'But you'd have to close it off from inside the access duct," said Junko.

"Which I won't be able to do in a bulky breather," insisted Aerrow. He pushed the helmet into Piper's hand and gave her his most reassuring look.

Piper looked on the verge of crying as she took the helmet into her hands, then grabbed Aerrow's shoulder. "You had better make it back." she said , turning her concern into a threat.

"Hey, It's me." said Aerrow not realizing how cocky he sounded. "I'll find a way."

His team mates then geared up and took off down the hall and then to the hanger bay where they would exit. Stork stopped and turned around to face Aerrow.

"She still likes me better, you know," he said. "Even for this."

Aerrow smiled and shook his head slowly back and forth. "She'll always have a special place in my heart Stork. And me in hers."

"I'd die for her too," said Stork narrowing his eyes. "I'll switch if you want."

Aerrow smiled sadly. "I've almost lost her so many times." he said ."And I guess I haven't always appreciated her."

Stork snorted.

Aerrow frowned. "But I'm going to make it up." he promised. "I might not show it Stork, but I love her as much as you do."

Finn's head popped out from behind the door. He had been listening to their entire conversation.

"Umm, hey, listen, sorry for like eavesdropping and all, but I couldn't help but hear. But, like, shouldn't you guys just let Piper chose who she wants to be with?" he asked.

"Piper?" They said in union. "We weren't talking about Piper."

Finn look surprised.

"_We were talking about the Condor."_

* * *

**A/N: I think Aerrow also has a secret love for the Condor. He risks his life to save her and he gets so mad when the colonel takes it. Guys and their cars :)**


	4. Christmas Surprise

Christmas Surprise

Aerrow and Radarr walked into the helm with a large goofy grin on his face.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Aerrow yelled with glee, eyes shut tight as he showed off his award winning smile. But after hearing no reply, he opened his eyes to find the helm empty. Where were the decorations? Where were his crew mates?

"Guys?" He said aloud, wondering if they were hiding. "Is this a joke?" He asked. His large Santa hat temporarily slid over his eyes.

"Where is the tree? The Stockings? The Gifts?" Aerrow said awestruck. Radarr chirped with displeasure.

"Presents hear I come!" Aerrow heard Finn's voice yell as he ran into the helm. The rest of the team mates walked in. Stork was yawning, a pair of antlers sitting lopsidedly on his head . He wore red and white striped stocking on his legs.

Piper came in after him, wearing a Santa hat like Aerrow, and a pair of reindeer PJ's.

Junko followed holding his teddy bear , who wore identical elf hats.

They stood there in shock.

"Aerrow," said Piper looking over at him. "Where is everything?"

"That's what I'd like to know." he replied sourly.

The Storm Hawks scanned the room, hoping to find something left. But the room and the rest of the ship, was empty of Christmas tassels.

"They took all the stockings!" said Aerrow, "How very unpleasant!"

"They took all our gifts," cried Finn. "They stole all my presents!"

"They took the tree," said Piper in shock. "All the crystal lights and my Star-crystal at the top!"

"They emptied the fridge," said Junko from the kitchen. "They took almost everything! How horrible, how savage!"

"Why," cried Stork indignant, "they stole my Merb cabbage!"

"Now who would do such a thing?" Aerrow said to his team. "So cruel, so unkind, and just downright mean?"

* * *

The big thrown room, which was usually boring,

Was filled with the chaos, of the Cyclonian's Christmas Morning.

Stockings lay tossed on the ground, empty and bare,

Wrappings thrown to the side without any care.

Snipe gobbled up candies and licked melted chocolate off his thumbs.

On Finn's brand new guitar hero, Ravess happily strummed,

Her marks were all perfect, points getting higher, and higher

As Dark Ace roasted chestnuts on the Storm Hawks' Christmas tree fire.

Other Talons ran by, throwing tinsel in the air,

When suddenly Cyclonis walked in and gave them a glare

"What is the meaning of this?" she asked, "Who, how, what and why?"

They grinned, some chuckled, then Dark Ace replied,

"We went to visit the Storm Hawks, just dropped in to say hi,

but since they were sleeping-" his grin met his eyes,

"You slaughtered them?" she cried, hopeful and excited.

"Murdered asleep!" she sounded delighted.

"No," said the Dark Ace, "Why would we do that?

We just took all their stuff, and then we came back."

Cyclonis frowned, feeling ever quite cross.

When a little Talon came up and in her hands put a box.

Cyclonis looked down at the tag, the name 'Piper' crossed out with pen

'To Cyclonis' replaced it, then came 'From Aerrow, Your Best Friend'

Inside was a crystal bracelet, glimmering orange, purple and silver

Which ends this sad poem cause nothing rhymes with these colours

"Well, I suppose it's alright," said Cyclonis, "If we take a holiday."

The Talons all cheered, "Hip, hip, hooray!"

So all Christmas, the red and green Cyclonians were completely amused

While the Storm Hawks spent Christmas _completely_ confused.

* * *

**A/N: StormyReader21: MERRY CHRISTMAS FAN FREAKS!!!!!**

**Other A/N: StormyWriter18: What she said. Hope your holiday season is better than the Storm Hawks' at least ;) Yeah I know, the format of this is WEIRD, but then again, so are we. **

**Have a holly, jolly Christmas....**


	5. Rash

**_Rash_**

Stork was scratching at his skin incessantly. Every few seconds he would even let go of the helm entirely to scratch himself. His teammates looked at him weirdly.

"Stork, are you okay?" asked Piper.

"Oh yeah, just fine," his said sarcastically. " Except for this _rash."_

Finn made a face. What was with Stork and this invisible rash business? He was always complaining about it.

"How much longer till were at Terra Merbia?" asked Aerrow eager to change the subject.

"Nothing," said Stork. "Were here." And lo and behold the Terra was in sight. Soon they landed and the Storm hawks departed eagerly, settling into the streets to look about the Terra. But what they saw surprised them. Merbian citizens went about on their way walking along while the Storm Hawks stared at them befuddled.

"Ummm," asked Piper, looking at the people passing by. "Stork?"

"Uh huh," replied Stork leading them down the street.

"Er…why is everyone _blue?" _Indeed it was true. All the merbs marching the town, or so in sight, were in fact blue.

Stork turned around grimacing. "_Told you I had a rash."_

* * *

**A/N: Makes you think eh? Maybe he's not suppose to be green. This would be funnier if we hadn't actually ever seen any other merbs. Oh well. **

**It's probably contagious too.**


	6. The Red Streak

**The Red Streak**

"Is it true your ride's really the fastest?" asked Aerrow.

"Is that a challenge?" said Starling smiling as the Storm Hawks followed her back to her ride. Another mission successfully completed, and she felt it was once again time to take her leave and return to her solitary life-style.

"Maybe." Aerrow replied.

Starling leaned up against her ride, painted mostly the same purple as hair, and patted it. "Well no one can beat me on the Red Streak."

Finn tilted his head. "Uh...the Red Streak?" he asked raising a finger.

"That's what she called." said Starling.

"Ummm…._why_?" he asked

Starling raised an eyebrow. "Because she's red, that's why. Isn't that obvious?"

The Storm Hawks looked at her.

"Starling?" said Aerrow.

"Yes?" she replied.

"You're colour-blind aren't you?"

* * *

**StormWriter18: It's really called the Red Streak. I suppose there's some interesting deep story behind it which Nerdcorps refuses to tell. That or Starling's colourblind.**


	7. Power Down

Power Down

The Dark Ace laughed maniacally. Finally it was completed! An exact replica of the SUV (Suit of Untold Vengeance) coupled with a triple power boost and even more blasters!

"Now I will crush those Storm Hawks once and for all!" The Dark Ace said victoriously. Already he was in the suit and he could feel the power coursing through him. "MOAR! MOAR! " he shouted curling his mechanical fists.

Suddenly there was a whirring noise and all the lights on the suit blinked off, the fuel monitor arrow dropped to empty, and the suit froze in it's position, arms raised in the air.

"What?" said the Dark Ace. "Grrrr!"

A Talon eating sandwich walked into view holding the end of a power cord in one hand.

"What are you doing?" the Dark Ace shouted. "It wasn't done charging yet! Plug it back in!"

"No can do sir." The Talon said calmly.

"And WHY NOT?" howled the Dark Ace.

The Talon took a bite of his sandwich.

"It's Earth Hour."

* * *

**StormWriter18: Tonight is Earth Hour everyone!Do Mother Nature a favour and flick off the electricity.**


	8. Your 1 out of 17,5

"Storm Hawks! Let's fly!" shouted Aerrow as he and the others dashed to the Hanger bay. They were facing off against the Dark Ace and a flock of Talons, outnumbering them two to one. Sounded like good odds. The Hanger bay doors opened.

Aerrow hopped on is his Skimmer , Radarr in the cockpit. The others were close behind. He revved the engine and the bike took off, dropped off the landing, opened it's wings-_ and promptly exploded._

_

* * *

_

"It's not nearly as bad as when you fell in the engine." said Piper by Aerrow's bedside where the Storm Hawks had gathered around the bandaged Skyknight and co-pilot.

"Maybe if you'd all let me made the safety adjustments to the skimmers this all could have been avoided." chastised Stork. He flung a piece of paper in Aerrow's face. Aerrow read it aloud.

"Air Skimmer III Ultra: Thank you for purchasing the latest model…_blah blah, blah…_gear maintenance…specially equipped with crystal fuel afterburner for burst of speed on deployment." his eyes squinted trying to read the smaller print. "Warning, crystal fuel afterburner may explode upon deployment on an average of 1 out of 17.5 deployments. Significant problems for the pilot may occur."

Stork pulled the paper away and folded his arms in a 'shouda read the manual' sort of look.

"Well," Aerrow sighed. "I guess it was bound to happen sooner or later."

* * *

**A/N StormWriter18: Honestly. It says that on the website. I'm waiting for it to happen. It's overdue actually.**


	9. Home Sweet Home

**Home Sweet Home**

The Dark Ace had adrenalin coursing through his veins. He and a group of elite Nightcrawlers had infiltrated the Condor and all the Storm Hawks were fast asleep completely unaware of their presence.

And their proximate end.

But before he was to slink into their rooms to 'finish the job', he wanted to search around the ship, perhaps cause some mayhem, but more so to see what had changed about it since he had last been aboard, so long ago.

* * *

First stop: The bridge.

It certainly looked the same, albeit, quite messy. And smelly. Books, food, garbage, cards and more was scattered all over the place. The Dark Ace leaned over the table and picked up a playing card. The ace of spades. The Dark Ace grinned and picking up a stray marker, sighed his name of the card, then pocketed the marker.

Walking around the room he stepped up the controls. Then he noticed something.

"What?" he exclaimed staring at it. "Are you kidding me?"

"Uh, what is it sir?" asked one of the Nightcrawlers.

The Dark Ace looked ready to explode. He whirled on the Nightcrawlers and pointed angrily at Condor's controls.

"They have _cup-holders! _Do you know how long I complained about getting cup-holders?"

* * *

Second stop: The Kitchen

Mumbling something about extra-medium cup holders, the Dark Ace strode into the kitchen, prepared to raid the Storm Hawks fridge. He stopped at the door, and stared at it incredulous.

"_Is that supposed to be me?"_

He whipped a piece of paper from the fridge door. On it was an angry looking doodle of himself. At first the Dark Ace frowned. Then he took out the market he had pocketed and, grinning evilly, touched up the doodle's face into a smile, and underneath the doodle's feet drew a doodle version of Aerrow being crushed and crying. He then wrote "Ha ha" all over the page and stuck it back onto the fridge.

* * *

Third stop: -

'That's it,' the Dark Ace thought. 'No more distractions. Just find Aerrow's room and kill him. Yes.' That made the Dark Ace smile, and forget the 'crazy' signals the Nightcrawlers kept making when his back was turned. He strode eagerly and quietly down the hall way.

Then, he stopped.

The door beside him seemed to beckon him in. His old room.

'Well, it can't possibly hurt' thought the Dark Ace. He just wanted to see who was now in his room, if anyone at all. If there was, he would kill them. No harm done. Well, to him anyways.

He placed his hand on the door lock.

Suddenly all six Storm Hawks jumped and fell out of bed, hearing a loud yell roar through the Condor.

"WHO DA HELL PAINTED IT PURPLE?"


	10. You think?

It had been bothering him for a while.

Aerrow sipped on his glass of orange juice thoughtfully. The Storm Hawks were sunbathing on the Condor's deck.

"You think…?"He started.

The others looked at him over their sunglasses.

"You think his name was really '_Lightening' ?"_

The others pursued their lips in thought, scratched their heads.

Stork leaned back down in his chair unconcerned. "Do you think the Dark Ace's first name is really '_Dark' ?"_

* * *

**SW18 A/N: Had this idea FOREVER- well no, not forever. For a while I wondered if his name was really supposed to be Lightening before I realized it was a title probably like the Dark Ace's. I think Strike sounds like a good first name. **


End file.
